It is human nature to desire for judgment to immediately fall on those who harm us or those we love. This is especially true for survivors of sexual abuse. I once led a support group of sexual abuse survivors comprised of several leaders in the church. Without exception, everyone longed for their abusers to be … Continue reading Is “Calling Down Fire” Really Necessary?
Author: Joy
Is It Christlike or Just Religious?
It important to know the difference because abuse survivors can be hurt or even retraumatized by behavior that resembles Christ at first glance but upon further examination has little in common with Him. This is one of the primary ways that the enemy of our souls keeps us from truly getting to know the Lord … Continue reading Is It Christlike or Just Religious?
Why I Have Decided to Come Forward Now
A counselor friend once said to me, “You’re only as sick as your secrets.” Well, today I want to share that I am a sexual abuse survivor as was my sister, my daughter, some of my cousins and probably many other members of our extended family. We came from a long line of secret-keepers. After … Continue reading Why I Have Decided to Come Forward Now
The Costly Impact of “Cheap Grace”
A friend asked recently why I had not posted in my blog since April 2021? Events that shook my world in the fall of 2021 immediately came to mind, along with the resulting pain of spiritual abuse that accompanied them. It began when a close friend confided that she saw online that our church’s newly … Continue reading The Costly Impact of “Cheap Grace”
The Secret No Sexual Abuse Victim Shares
Recently I read a book written by a 17-year-old girl who had been sexually abused by a family friend from early childhood into her teenage years. In the comments section, an Amazon reviewer wrote, “She tells somewhere in this book there are some experiences she doesn’t want known,” then the reviewer went on to suggest … Continue reading The Secret No Sexual Abuse Victim Shares
The Day the Emojis Died
The year 2020 was difficult for most of us. It was especially difficult for me. In early December I lost my best friend. She had been with me through thick and thin. She knew me before and after my story of abuse. She was my sounding board, my confidant, and one of few people I … Continue reading The Day the Emojis Died
What Do You Say When Conflicts Arise?
One of the greatest struggles in my life has been finding my voice when conflicts arise. If I am honest, I have found it easier to talk about people rather than to them, especially when misunderstandings occur! I have struggled to express my thoughts even though I know my feelings and opinions are valid. As … Continue reading What Do You Say When Conflicts Arise?
Why Do You Make Me Look at Injustice?
Have you ever wondered why justice is so long in coming, or maybe you’ve concluded that it will never come? After all, what justice is there in a child being raped? Adding insult to injury, why do so many perpetrators remain “free,” while their victims live lives of quiet desperation battling ongoing PTSD, betrayal, and … Continue reading Why Do You Make Me Look at Injustice?
Where You are Going Matters!
Recently the story of Hager in Genesis 16 and 21 spoke to me as it relates to a history of abuse. I had never actually considered her story before it jumped off the page at me. In an odd sort of way, her story offers encouragement to folks like me who sometimes get lost in … Continue reading Where You are Going Matters!
When Grooming is Mistaken for Love
This poignant image of a precious little girl on her way to have fun in the company of a wolf stirs me deeply. As she glances over her shoulder, she is unaware of the menacing look in the wolf’s eyes. The image captures for me both the innocence and vulnerability of a child being “groomed” … Continue reading When Grooming is Mistaken for Love